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Great Bad Movie – THE MANSTER

THE MANSTER is entertaining, educational, and only a little bit racist!

What’s up with me and movies where two heads share one body? I love ‘em! Guess it gets a little lonely up here, with my one head, and it’d be nice to have someone to talk to on long subway rides. But though it would have you believe it’s about the duality of heads, at its core this movie is a time capsule – of good-ol’-fashioned American values – like orientalism and xenophobia. See, a nice American reporter in Japan falls under the sway of an evil Japanese doctor, who gives him a potion that turns him into half man, half monster – and total asshole! Soon he cuts off all communication with his beautiful American fiancee, is plain rude to his American friends, and descends into drink and decadence – courtesy of those irresistible Japanese geishas! But good woman that she is, his fiancee crosses the Pacific to fight for her man – and what results is mad-science at its finest, punctuated by theremin and ambient beeping and highlighted by cave mutants, bad over-the-top acting, and an evil doctor who walks around explaining what he’s about to do! Pure hokum – you’ll laugh your heads off!

May 12, 2010   No Comments

Great Bad Movie – ROBOT MONSTER

ROBOT MONSTER is pure uncut What the Crap!?!?

“Overwhelming! Electrifying! Baffling!” promises the trailer, and to their credit they’re absolutely 1/3 correct. The movie begins with some very impressive sounding chit-chat between two gorillas in diving helmets – i.e. aliens – communicating via TV screen/bubble machine. The earthbound alien, Ro-man, recounts the destruction of all of humanity – a thing which he just did just now. Of course there’s a spunky young tyke eavesdropping outside his cave, so we know Ro-Man’s boasts are a bit premature, and Supreme commander corroborates this when he says “in the 22nd category there is error of 16 billionths” – which means 8 people are still alive – these aliens with their fancy English! Anyway, this all happens in the first 10 minutes, and the rest of the movie is even sillier, including some uncomfortable family dynamics as mother and son take on a surrogate father rather quickly and awkwardly. By movie’s end the filmmakers have succeeded in what I believe is their greatest lasting accomplishment: making Ed Wood look like Stanley Kubrick.

May 10, 2010   No Comments

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